The cool must of cave walls was thick and crisp. Sleek and solid, flawless darkness, hung in the air, glossy blackness, godless in this belly of the earth.
Our footsteps settled into reverberating rhythm, slow and cautious, cyclical.
We walked, her hand in mine. The crisp echoes of water drops rattled off the cavern walls.
Like the weight of my body, familiar but alien, and the strength of my stride, are all just a distant kind of tactile memory.
That churning vacancy in my chest throbbed. In our silence, I began to wonder if I was dead alive, or worse yet.
I drew a deep irrational breath that staggered my stride. My chest…
“I can’t go anymore.” I said
“I’m sure there’s something up here, c’mon.”
“I can’t. I’m tired.” I said. “I think.”
“You want to rest.”
“I think so.”
“I don’t think that’s why you want to stop.”
“Where are we going?”
“I want to know where we’re going.”
“But if we go together…”
“I don’t know what any of this is, and I’ve been way too cool about it all,” I said. “Look, I feel like we’re both kind of fucked here.”
I paused. And then she spoke up from the darkness.
“I’m following.” She said.
It was all the invitation anyone could expect, “Because we’re both here, and you took me with you…”
“You promised yourself.” She cut in
“Yeah, I know, I remember I promised to, but here we are, right? It’s just, it doesn’t seem fair, ya know? That I promised myself to you and all, or whatever…
“And there are some really weird things I’ve been seeing and there’s something going on inside me. Like there’s something missing. but check this out, and maybe I’m only saying it now in the dark because I’m a coward or because I wanna be completely honest and just… this is where we are right now,” I say in the pitch black. I’m beginning to feel elated. As I imagine and relive this, it always occurs the same fuckin way. Like this.
“Do you love me?”
She must have swam dramatically in that question, rhetorical. Comment.
The weight of conviction to a celestial, heavens to Betsy, demigod.
“I love you the way neutrons exist. Devoted and devestating. I saw you, first you, before tens of billions, and you saw me and that was when the universe exploded and created life and cast it millions of miles out, and became so magnicent that it created space and imagined time and constructed gravity with the weight of its own actions, building its laws as they erupted.
“That happened inside me when I saw you sleep, and when I saw your heart, your thoughts and trepidation and confusion.”
“That’s what I’m saying. I’m confused. By all this. I don’t know how I can explain it, but I did feel all that. Obviously, but ultimately, your a girl. And I think you’re beautiful. But I just don’t really…
“I don’t like girls. I don’t mean that!! I mean, I “like” boys. And I know you’re really attracted to me and all. And here we are in this completely dark cave and I’m turning you down and I probably didn’t even have to say anything. I was probably over reacting and, fuck, I’m sorry. I just got scared you were thinking…–”
She grabbed me and held me firm against her body, standing over me. She dominated my body and stole my kiss aggressively.
I felt that falling elation, the way her sweet lips insisted, candy peach tongue that trespassed mine.
She pulled me in by my chest, desperate lust, and I drew her hips into mine, they were volcanic together. She buried her fingers in my hair and pulled out her sexual anguish, while I buried myself in her and did the same.
Even while we lay as we did on the cave floor, wet and ruined, our driving growls and calls out reverberated throughout the caverns, periodically reminding us of the sound of our own ecstasy. Like a fimiliar scent.
We eventually continued forward, resolved.
Then the song began at the end of the growing hallway.
That’s a different story